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Posts Tagged ‘humor’

A piercing scream cut through the quiet night, ricocheted off concrete walls and echoed onto the city street.  A hollow thud then gasp of air followed.  It was the woman’s last breath.

A dark figure loomed over the body.

Bobby-Joe McKintock had just frightened his nosey, old neighbor to death; quite by accident, when in jest, he’d jumped out of the shadows.

A sinister laugh caromed through the night.  Bobby-Joe glanced around then disappeared into the darkness before the backlash of what he’d done hit him.

Quiet fell upon the city street.  The silence was deafening.

Sounds of sirens and gunshots ensued.

It was a ricochet that ended him.

As it turns out, the rebound effect is no joking matter!

Thank-you for following, reading, sharing and commenting – The Trefoil Muse

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Feeling cold and sluggish?

Perhaps you need a little more warmth in your life.

Indulge yourself.

Drink a cup of hot chocolate.

Chocolate not only warms your heart but your soul.

Dark chocolate keeps you healthy by adding antioxidants. 

Antioxidants lower blood pressure and increase circulation to your heart.

Not enough sweetness in your life?

Add some marshmallows.

Feeling dull or sluggish?

Spice up your life.

Be adventurous,

Add a cinnamon stick to your cup of hot chocolate for extra flavor.

If you are daring enough, you can get even more spicy.

Nothing warms your heart on a cold day like a cup of hot chocolate 

with a few drops of hot sauce.  

Sit back and relax.

You will feel the heat running through your body in no time.

Enjoy the burn.

No one really needs an excuse to indulge in chocolate!

Chocolate’s heart healthy.

Just warm your heart up a little if you’re cold.

Get spicy!

 

 

Thank-you for following, reading, sharing and commenting – The Trefoil Muse

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Baby, it’s cold outside!

It’s the end of November and it is -13 degrees Celsius (12.2 Fahrenheit). The wind has been blowing with gusts of 42 km (27 mph) and higher so it feels like -23C (-9.4 F).  It’s so frigid that I am unable to think.  Perhaps, I have frozen my brain…

How does a Canadian prevent brain freeze in the winter?

 

Word of the Day – Toque

              /tōk/

Canadian definition: 

A close-fitting knitted hat, often with a tassel or pom-pom on the crown.

People also ask

How do you use it in a sentence?

I will use it in a sentence so that you can both remember what it is and how to pronounce it.

“It’s so cold outside, that I toque a wool cap and put it on my head.”

And, that my friend’s is also how a Canadian prevents brain freeze in the winter!

Stay warm!      

 

Thank-you for following, reading, sharing and commenting – The Trefoil Muse

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The mission is murder. 

The buzz word is fly!

In the name of fair play, I did warn them.  I said, “If you don’t leave this premises, you will die! This is not your home. You are not allowed to gather here!”

But, they cannot help themselves. 

It seems they have invited swarms more. The house is a buzz of activity.  I am not as hospitable as they have assumed.  They have over-stayed their welcome and have gotten on my last nerve.

They are pests. Pests that like to do the backstroke in my morning coffee or drown in it. They bug me, these uninvited guests. They steal the very food from my plate – pests. Their flying buddies like to swan dive into my hair or fly up my nose. They don’t understand the word, ‘No!’ It amuses these pests to touch my body with their creepy little insect feelers. They won’t stop.  It gives them a buzz then they get high! They just won’t stop irritating me, even going as far as landing on my hands as I type this!

Enough! 

The mission is now murder!

Fly swatter in hand, I am in full stealth mode.  My trusty cat is assisting me in stalking the many-eyed prey! It seems that they have pestered her beyond her limits as well.  She alerts me to their presence with her surreptitious cat call.

The flies think they will out smart me by camouflaging themselves on dark furniture or hiding in plain sight.  I suppose they assume they can out maneuver me since they have thousands of watchful eyes observing my every move.

 “Wrong!”

The swat team and I have taken down a number of assailants.  Their bodies are piling up!  Some of the fly survivors are conducting forensics on the dead or perhaps they are cannibals foraging on their own kind. 

They get the smack down.  At times, it’s a smorgasbord; multiple bodies with one swat or a two for one deal – a regular kill pattern for this experienced swat team.

It’s war. We have no mercy, the pests were forewarned!

Finally, after an hour of stalking and murdering flies, it has gone deathly quiet.  The pests that are left have gone underground or into cracks or crevices. They are difficult to find. 

But, I am smarter than a fly. I will patiently outwit them.

I only need to wait until the time is right before I raid their fly encampments.  For now though, the swat team has further business to take care of.  Death is cumbersome and we must dispose of the multitude of fly corpses before their living relatives feel the sting of the upcoming raid. There will be more bodies. The remains will be disposed of.  This is not a game. This is war; I must take time to plan the next siege on these pests before the next swarm appears.  These pests have eyes everywhere.  I dare not rest, the swat team and I need to plan and perhaps rally more troops.

In the meantime, if any of you have had the intention of visiting in the form of an insect or let’s say; a fly on the wall; beware – my buzz word this season is, ‘Fly,’ and I’m on a murder mission.

All other company is welcome! Please feel free to bring your own swatter! Be prepared to raid flying pests when necessity warrants.

 

Thank-you for following, reading, sharing and commenting – The Trefoil Muse

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Push-Me-Pull-You Effect? 

“What is the Push-Me-Pull-You effect?” you ask. 

In simple terms, it is an interest of a person, party or idea undone by indecisiveness and fear of commitment by the other person, party or idea.

The Push-Me-Pull-You effect perfectly explains why it is such a lengthy process to rid ourselves of the bloated, constipated, far-reaching mandates and restrictions we are subjected to in Canada.

Let’s see in simple terms how the Push-Me-Pull-You effect explains our current dilemma in politics today as it works in a Democracy such as Canada because, in my opinion it explains the tactics used by all elected parties.

The Push-Me-Pull-You effect isn’t something new but it has greatly inhibited us especially in the past few years under a minority Government.  Neither; is the Push-Me-Pull-You effect a tactic that just started recently.  As far as I’m concerned, the Push-Me-Pull-You effect has been a never ending cycle in every political arena practiced by bureaucrats since its dawning day – the cycle being that of ‘deflecting blame,’ rather than that of ‘taking responsibility.’  The premise seems to be that the political party who is able to deflect blame more successfully onto the opposition gets to stay in power of the Ivory Throne. In Canada, the Ivory throne is on Parliament Hill.

However, the never ending Push-Me-Pull-You tactics involved in the political arena which has led to a bad habit of Members of Parliament quickly succumbing to a strategic game of, ‘Blame and Finger Point,’ played between the Federal, Provincial, and municipal governments has caused nothing more than constipated thinking from those same elected Members who then look down on the working class people from their parliamentary Ivory Towers.  Their privileged lifestyle has put them out of touch with real people on the ground.

The real people on the ground are the working class.  And, they are the type of people that not only walks their talk but take action.  They don’t have to take a poll to know what to do or go to work.  They know what needs to be done, and they do it.  They know how to work.

 Meanwhile, in the Ivory Tower on parliament hill, another backdoor meeting took place because regardless of speeches on transparency, our elected Liberal officials don’t know what to do without a plan.  And, this elected Liberal party rallied against the plan, made by the opposition party, the Conservatives; whom, on February 14, 2022; actually planned on voting on a plan, to make a plan to end the over-reaching pandemic mandates of the elected Liberal party with the help of other Liberals and other opposition parties.

It’s actually quite sad that the opposition parties had to poll people before they could present a plan, to vote on a plan, to make a plan.  If they vote to agree to make a plan; then they will vote on a date to debate on the plans, to make a plan. It takes a gross amount time, to talk of the talk, to just plan, to make a plan. It’s time consuming to plan, to make a plan. Neither party wants to offend the other party on the plan, to even talk about the plan or draft up the plan because they need each other’s votes to pass the plan on making the plans, plan. Then they need to canvass the popularity of the plan to make the plans on the plan. That’s before they can even take any action on the plan.  But, that’s democracy – isn’t it! Democracy is a big old popularity contest on plans to make plans. And, the polls dictate which popular plans will be planned because the tax payers pay for the planning of the plans, plan so should be factored into to planning of the plan.

I’m wondering how many of those Ivory Tower occupants actually went and spoke face to face to any of the people who fund their pay checks before they made a plan to poll the people on the plan, to make a plan and then attempt to pass the plan

The majority of Canadians know how to make a plan, execute it and then work to accomplish the fulfillment of the plan because, they know how to work together in order to succeed unlike their Ivory Tower observers – the Push-Me-Pull-You’s who love the popularity of the polls on their plans to make and plan plans but never plan on actually executing the plans – that would take a time management plan which would probably take more than 2 to 4 years to plan!

So, you can see, what type of effect of the Push-Me-Pull-You has on parliament hill, and why there is a bunch of moaning, bloated, irritated tantrum throwing, red faced Members of Parliament – their burdened, constipated mindsets must make a plan before any movement can pass.  And, when their planned plans to make plans can’t pass, movement is stagnated and more constipated planning ensues.

 The majority of Canadians are very observant and open-minded like myself.  We like our freedom and are choosing to no longer be impeded by the Push-Me-Pull-You’s.

Push-Me-Pull-You’s are slow-moving and have restricted or inhibited thought patterns.  Their bloated, constipated mandates and restrictions need to be excreted into archives of history.

 Enough with the planning already!

Can someone please deliver the Push-Me-Pull-You’s some diuretics so we can get some free flowing movement on Parliament Hill?

End the Constipation!

End the Emergency Act!

Canada is the true, north, strong and free!

Thank-you for following, reading, sharing and commenting The Trefoil Muse

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The past week or so have certainly been jam packed with current events in Canada as the Freedom Convoy rolled into an unprepared Ottawa taking politicians and residents by surprise.

When unprecedented numbers of the silent majority stand together for a common cause such as freedom and do it peacefully, it has a way of inspiring the world and bringing such things as corruption and political pandering to the forefront.

All one has to do is compare honest truth alongside that of corruption to see for yourself who the real peace keepers of Canada have been for the last fortnight.  (No offense intended here but they have not been our politicians or Legacy News reporters.)  The real peace keepers standing strong and united for our freedoms are truck drivers, farmers, small business owners and families from every corner of our vast country.

The information and stories evolving from the Freedom Movement come so quickly that it is nearly impossible to stay current on them.  I quite literally have no words or perhaps there are too many of them bouncing around in my head to get down. 

Some of the coverage has been absolutely hilarious.  My kudos go to: Russell Brand #UnderTheSkin, Tucker Carlson *Tonight* on Fox News and the Lotuseaters.com Media/News Company for your great sense of humor and for the coverage each of you supplied for our freedom movement.  I’d also like to give a little shout out to Western Standard – Cory Morgan’s rant on his morning show Triggered; the “new normal,” which I thoroughly enjoyed.

One of the more interesting developments I’ve also noticed along with the arrival of the convoy is the amount of extremely talented artists coming across social media sites, all using their voices in some way shape or form.  I managed to save some art by some very talented cartoonists before they got censored.  See below:

 

                             

 

 

The fight for our freedom in Canada is very real. I have used a few examples in this post of the types of free speech we can lose.  We are already having our freedom of speech censored. Use your voices Canada!  Let’s mandate freedom.

I am standing up for Freedom.

Honk if you do too!

Thank-you for following, reading, sharing and commentingThe Trefoil Muse

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I know patience is a virtue but could you please hurray up!said the Turtle to the Snail.

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“Go ahead, you can pet her.  It’s okay.”

Little Britches eyed his father suspiciously, even at the ripe old age of two; he’d mastered the art of discernment.

Little Britches’ father was his hero. Still, he wasn’t totally convinced that petting that little bunting cow at the edge of the deck sniffing lilacs was in his best interest.  Heck, the cows buddy, a young golden lab, knocked him over in exuberant body wriggling, tail wagging licking episodes – and, that farm dog wasn’t as big as the mini black cow with the white face they called Mable!

Little Britches shoved his hands deep into the pocket of his jeans and shifted his weight from one rubber boot to the other, his bright inquiring eyes peering up at his father from below his Blue Jays ball cap. He needed a tidbit more encouragement before attempting, “Mission: touch-the-cow!” (more…)

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You’re being watched…

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The North American Buffalo (Bison) Calf;

Otherwise known as a Bobblehead…

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