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The Trefoil Muse

Words are art on paper, and for me they are the seeds of my soul.

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Where’s the Thing?

March 3, 2021 by Nadine Gordon

The word for today is “thing”.

I have developed a fondness for the word “thing”- albeit, it is somewhat of a love/hate relationship.

My use of the word “thing,” usually coincides with episodes in my life where I know that if I am using the word “thing,” I am experiencing some type of mental block.  At these times, it is as if the universal vacuum has descended from above to clean out my cranium.  Just like any other vacuum, the universal one can accidentally suck up useful things as well as cobwebs.

The universal vacuum likes information.  And, just for your information, I am all for loosing such things that constitute life’s most embarrassing moments from my memory bank.

But does it really need to suck out my brain’s capacity to access its inner dictionary?

At such seemingly unintellectual times; those I can only define as brain dead moments, it makes me wonder – where’s the thing?  Meaning, my brain!

During the brain dead moments – where once an author’s well coiffed vocabulary of colorful, descriptive, intellectual, flowing intelligence once thrived – a now dark, vacant hole exists.  Throughout the course of these vacant, long pause moments, no other words exist in my brain except for the word “thing.”  So, I have grudgingly resorted to using the word “thing,” quite often. Luckily, the word “thing,” can be used as a verbal descriptor during desperate times when I need to communicate with others. It can be subbed in for another word at anytime because “thing,” can literally take on any meaning.  See the definition of “thing,” below:

 

Thing | Definition of Thing by Merriam-Webster

http://www.merriam-webster.com › dictionary › thing
 1 : an object or entity not precisely designated or capable of being designated use this thing. 2a : an inanimate object distinguished from a living being. b : a separate and distinct individual quality, fact, idea, or usually entity.
 
 
 
Have you ever noticed how the word, “thing,” can be used to describe so many other things?

Have you ever tried finding something when you can’t recall the name of the thing?

It’s virtually impossible to find anything if you don’t know the word for the “thing” being searched for.  You can’t look it up in a dictionary or even Google it if you don’t know the name of a “thing.”

I am infamous for asking my family and friends where the “thing,” is.

“Thing,” is my favorite word.  It describes everything.  This is especially true when of all things; I am having a mental block.  This is when anything can become the “thing.”

“Where’s the thing?”

It is no small thing when someone knows exactly what thing I am looking for without my having to resort to the description of the thing.  Sometimes, they just know what thing I’m looking for.  That makes things easier.

It’s when they don’t know what “thing” I’m looking for that can turn a small thing into a big thing.  I will attempt to describe the “thing” by saying something, anything to give clues regarding the “thing.”   (I imagine to the onlooker it would seem as if I had regressed into some primal cavewoman persona by grunting, undulating and using sign language to convey the meaning of the “thing.”  My actions are almost like charades but much less graceful when I am brain dead and stressed.) What I am in need of is feedback to find the “thing.”  Sometimes, the act of brainstorming with others will help me have an epiphany or accomplish something, like finding the “thing.”

By now, I’m certain that you are beginning to understand why I have formed a love/hate relationship with the word “thing.”   However, please read on.

A “thing,” can be anything.  A thing is an object or entity not precisely designated or capable of being designated.  So if you research thing, it is doubtful it will describe the particular “thing” you are looking for.

My life is full of things.  It’s amazing how many things you can accumulate in a short span of time especially if your interests are varied.  I have multiple interests and hobbies aside from my family and work-life.  Plus, I love animals – you could say I’m a hobby farmer as well.  If nothing else, I consider myself to be fairly well rounded because I dabble in a bit of everything and enjoy learning about new things.  With all of these varied interests, you can only imagine the head scratching that goes on around me when I ask, “Where’s the thing?”

The “thing,” can be related to almost anything and more over, by the time I get around to asking where the “thing” is, chances are I’ve probably already looked through everything and have been unsuccessful at finding the “thing” so now I’m asking, “Where is the bleeping thing?”

(Oops… those particular descriptors for the “thing” aren’t helpful.)  I’m quick to observe these things!

My unusual cursing verbiage over the “thing” normally, results in my looking into gaping, vacant, expressionless faces this is due in part because:

  1. they have had no idea that I’ve even been searching for anything and,
  2. they have been shocked into stunned silence

So, I try again.

Let me share a past experience when we raised goats on our hobby farm.

“Where’s the bleepity bleep thing?”

My family is stunned silent and is gaping at me incredulously.  But, they will inevitably ask,

“What thing?”

“You know,” I say, “the thing! The thing to trim the goat’s feet…”  I’m trying not to be frustrated while still encouraging them to brainstorm.

 

“Hoof trimmers?” one of them ventures to guess.

“No!”  (I have hoof trimmers but they are for larger animals – horses and cows.)  “You know; you can use them to cut wire with too!”

“Fence cutters, scissors, the jack-knife, pliers, … fingernail cutters?”

“What? Fingernail cutters?”  There is some laughter at this point because I have actually

referred to fingernail cutters as hoof trimmers in the past.

“Look in the junk drawer,” is the agreed upon instruction I receive from my family even though  I’ve already looked through all of those gadgets, widgets and odds ‘n end things and couldn’t find the thing.

I will however look in the junk drawer again for the bleeping thing because doing anything when you are looking for something is better than doing nothing.

Ever had one of those drawers that stick?  One that has never ever  opened with a gentle touch?

You can see where this thing is going right?

Never in the history of mankind did that thing ever open without the use of full body weight and /or brute force.

Interesting thing; gentle would have worked; but – things just happen!

This is the instant however, when one small thing turned into a very BIG Thing!  Things were everywhere!  It was time to pause and do the “breathing” thing.

Thing is; I still couldn’t find the “thing” I was looking for but all the other things were everywhere else.   Now I had to stop and take stock of all the other little things because I’d just added one more thing to my list of things to do.  Not to mention, it was the point at which I gave up looking for the “thing” then drove to the hardware store, (a place where you can buy this, that or the other thing,) to buy a new “thing” to replace the old “thing” because no one knew what the “thing” was that I was looking for as I’d failed miserably at my attempt to describe the “thing” accurately.

I did at least take solace in knowing that I had a new “thing” to use on my goats feet.  Plus, I have re-learned the name of the “thing” and put it back into my inner-dictionary’s memory bank.

And; I am fully certain that when I go to put my new “thing” away, my old “side-cutters” will probably show up right where I left them – in the toolbox – of all things!

This is merely one of my personal experiences with the word “thing.”

I have, among other things, been known to ask for directions to an event by asking, “Where’s the thing?”

What an enigma!

I really do have a love/hate relationship with the word “thing”.

Can anyone else relate to this phenomenon with “thing”?  It could be nothing but it might be everything.

It’s okay if you can’t relate to my “thing” as long as you continue to do your own “thing.”

All I know is that my bungling relationship with the word, “thing” has become a never ending source of entertainment – that is something if not anything.

Thank-you for reading this “thing,” please feel free to follow, like, comment or share.

 

 

 

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Posted in Compositions | Tagged art, blog, creative writing, creativity, goats, humor, inspiration, junk, thing, word-of-the-day | 3 Comments

3 Responses

  1. on March 16, 2021 at 5:25 pm Rivergirl

    I’ve misplaced many a thing in my day. As well as my fair share of thingamabobs and thingamajigs.

    LikeLiked by 2 people


  2. on March 24, 2021 at 1:22 pm Forestwood

    My husband asks where is that thing? all the time. I have no idea what he is talking about. Lol…

    LikeLike


    • on March 24, 2021 at 1:30 pm Nadine Gordon

      My family feels the same way! 🤣😂🤣

      LikeLiked by 1 person



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