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The Trefoil Muse

Words are art on paper, and for me they are the seeds of my soul.

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I Confess…

November 4, 2021 by Nadine Gordon

I confess; I believe the real problem with my childhood is that I lived in a fantasy world.

When I got older, I searched for enlightenment.

Along with enlightenment came an intense sense of disillusionment.

No one warned me that enlightenment would cause my fantasy world to dissolve into chaos.

Enlightenment is destructive.  It makes you take a look at the world as it really is.  I didn’t like what I was seeing.  People whom I adored were not who I’d envisioned – they had faults – perfect faults – faults I’d over-looked, faults I’d blinded myself to. I became very angry, disillusioned and broken.

It seemed as if my magical world had dissolved into nothingness.  Everywhere I looked, I saw chaos.  And, I felt it intensely.

When you awaken from your fantasies, you see the world in a clear sense – this is enlightenment.  You are now able to see the truth instead of the lies you have been feeding yourself.  Although the fantasy is gone, magic remains.  You begin to notice miracles in the tiniest object.  You observe the normal with curious, innocent, childlike eyes of wonder.  You become settled because you know that the chaos of the world actually enhances these small wonders and are grateful for them.  At the same time, you strive not to enter the chaotic realm.

Your life within the world becomes a rhythmic dance as you weave in and out of turbulent forces.  You know without a doubt that life is good.  It is a dance. It is a miracle.  You are aware that you have not only touched the magic but are a part of it.

That’s the reality.

That’s enlightenment.

The world is very angry right now.  Fantasies are dissolving into chaos.  This is enlightenment.

It will take time for the masses to learn the dance of magic thus tempering the chaos with calm.

Have faith in magic, miracles really do happen!

And, I must confess; that’s my dream.  

 

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Posted in Lessons of the Drum | Tagged chaos, childhood, confess, creative writing, dance, dream, enlightenment, fantasy, lifestyle | 17 Comments

17 Responses

  1. on November 4, 2021 at 7:56 am Terry

    Another thought provoking post, Nadine. I love the way you can spin what sounds like a dark post into something that’s light and hopeful!

    LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on November 4, 2021 at 8:10 am Nadine Gordon

      Thank you Terry! It’s always nice to hear such supportive comments! ❤ 💙 💜 💖

      LikeLiked by 1 person


  2. on November 4, 2021 at 7:56 am Tippy Gnu

    Shattered fantasies and chaos does seem to be part of the process. And seeing the heroes of our childhood as impermanent, unreliable beings can be a bit jolting. But I think it’s also freeing, as it allows us to seek our own way, and find our own joys in life.

    LikeLiked by 2 people


    • on November 4, 2021 at 8:14 am Nadine Gordon

      I agree!
      It can be very difficult to see your childhood hero’s as real people with flaws but it is meant to empower our individual growth.
      Thanks for your insightful comment Tippy!

      LikeLiked by 1 person


  3. on November 4, 2021 at 8:53 am cheriewhite

    This resonates so much with not only me but most people, I think. It was painful to see that my once-thought heroes were imperfect but it was a much-needed process. It’s how we grow. Thank you so much for writing about it so beautifully, Nadine. 💖

    LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on November 4, 2021 at 9:46 am Nadine Gordon

      Thanks for your comment Cherie!
      I’m glad it resonated with you! 😊

      LikeLiked by 1 person


      • on November 4, 2021 at 10:30 am cheriewhite

        You’re very welcome. 😊🤗

        LikeLiked by 1 person


  4. on November 4, 2021 at 12:56 pm nonsmokingladybug

    A great post. I enjoyed reading it but it also made me sad because it’s true.

    LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on November 4, 2021 at 1:00 pm Nadine Gordon

      When you see that your hero’s and leaders have vulnerabilities and that they are fallible it can be disheartening to begin with that’s for sure!
      Thanks so much for reading and commenting! 😊

      LikeLike


  5. on November 4, 2021 at 3:40 pm Rivers Renewed

    So profound and deeply beautiful!

    LikeLiked by 2 people


    • on November 4, 2021 at 5:09 pm Nadine Gordon

      Thank you Nico! 💖

      LikeLiked by 1 person


      • on November 4, 2021 at 10:59 pm Rivers Renewed

        Blessings!

        LikeLike


  6. on November 6, 2021 at 7:21 am AmyRose🌹

    Oh my goodness!! Your words are perfect. Yes YES enlightenment is very painful and it is a process wherein all that you “thought” your world to be is not. I’ve been there sitting in a pile of ashes not knowing who I am or what my life is truly about. However, when we rebuild ourselves empowering us by finding the Truth within, we then begin to see with such clarity and yes we are able to dance with life, in between all the chaos and pain. Beautiful to know others are walking as I am ….. THIS is where all of humanity is headed.

    LikeLiked by 1 person


  7. on November 6, 2021 at 8:03 am Nadine Gordon

    Thanks for commenting Amy! 🙂
    I’m hoping others read this post and see enlightenment as a normal process of life.

    LikeLike


  8. on November 6, 2021 at 5:15 pm joyroses13

    Well done!
    “It will take time for the masses to learn the dance of magic…thus tempering the chaos with calm.” Love it!
    And yes, miracles do happen, keep believing! ❤

    LikeLiked by 1 person


  9. on November 30, 2021 at 7:48 am Chiru

    Thoughtful post..Enlightenment is same in all cases

    LikeLiked by 1 person


    • on November 30, 2021 at 7:52 am Nadine Gordon

      Yes, and a very normal process that people go through! 😊
      Thanks so much for reading and commenting!

      LikeLiked by 1 person



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